your life is not a waste of time.

I think what most people don't realize about God is that He has not put us here in order to play with us and laugh maniacally as if we were helpless little ants. We are not mistakes, random chances of molecules and carbons and all that mumbo jumbo somehow combining to create a human with emotions and a beating heart. We are prized possessions of the Lord.

He made the land, sea, day, night, all the creatures that walk the face of the Earth, and when He was finished with these, He had to create a masterpiece. He had to make something that had His own image inscribed into it from birth. He had to create humans, the crowning jewels of an already brilliant diadem. He formed us from the dust, and breathed a holy breath of life into us. On the days prior all He had to do was speak and things would come into existence, but on the sixth day, the Lord breathed into man and he became. He relates to something for the first time, shedding light on how we are to respond. He sets us apart from all the wonderful things He has created and gives us domain over the whole earth.

This is why it is so disheartening to hear people say that their life is a complete and utter waste of time. Nothing is going right, and therefore if would probably be better for everyone if they ceased to exist. No. We were put here for a purpose. We were created by a God so we could have a personal relationship with Him. And He delights in us. All the things about us that we think are so weird in a worldly sense, He loves. He meticulously crafted every part of us and He finds great joy in His creations. Psalm 45:11 says "The King is enthralled by your beauty." The word 'enthralled' is defined as "filled with wonder and delight." Almighty God, the creator of the stars and galaxies far off, who with words formed the oceans and mountains, is filled with wonder and delight by my beauty? Absolutely.

So, are you listening now? You are not a waste. You are a captivating creation of our God. You are cared for immensely. He loves you more than anything in this world. He is dying for you to realize this and surrender your life to Him. In fact, He did die for this. He gave up His Lamb for all of mankind, just so we could know Him like we could not before. I pray that all of us can realize this. Look around at all the glorious things God has made: the colors that paint the sunset, majestic mountains that tower over everything else, snow that glistens in the sunlight. Your existence alone is far more beautiful than all of these, not to mention all of mankind.

13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.

¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

¹⁶ your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

¹⁷ How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!

¹⁸ Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand.
When I awake,
I am still with you.

Psalm 139: 14-18

Don't forget who made you. You are worth more than you could ever imagine.

can't get no satisfaction?

Wowwww. A lot has happened since I blogged last. I'm not very good at this, but I guess I have to feel pretty inspired to write a blog.

One of my main struggles as a believer is getting validation and complete satisfaction from God alone. I know we all struggle with that. As humans we have an innate desire to stray away from the Lord. Worldy things and relationships are easier to choose because they are visible, right here in front of us, while God is harder to comprehend because we cannot physically give Him a hug or talk to Him face to face. We can't always hear His voice. After all, we were given the free will to decide what to do with our time here on Earth.

In Atlanta at Cru's Unveiled Conference, I guessed I just reached a breaking point. I realized how much I was looking for worldly validation...in friendships, material things, boys, basically everything except God. All the while, I had Him on the back burner. Praise God, though, He never gives up on His children. He brought me to a place of brokenness, and showed me everything I was running to instead of Him. It was during worship the first night. Tenth Avenue North played a concert and they were a.m.a.z.i.n.g. I have heard this one song by them a million times, but I never truly stopped to think about the lyrics:

Before the sun has touched the sky
Colors bursting from Your eyes
Before the flood of the morning light
Before the earth has felt Your heat
Before I stand up to my feet
Before I begin to feel this weak

Satisfy me Lord, oh oh
Satisfy me Lord, oh oh
I'm begging You, to help me see
You're all I want, You're all I need
Oh, satisfy me Lord

When the day is closing in
Like the stars in the night I am falling
Into the pull of the earth and it's affection
In me, oh lord, can you create
A pure heart cuz I'm afraid
That I just might run back to the things I hate

Satisfy me Lord, oh oh
Satisfy me Lord, oh oh
Yeah, I'm begging You, to help me see
You're all I want, You're all I need
Oh, satisfy me Lord

You're beautiful, You're beautiful
You're more than all this world can give
You're beautiful, You're beautiful
You're love is all I need to live

It describes exactly how I was feeling. I was sick of turning to other things for satisfaction, when the only One who could give me total satisfaction, the peace that transcends all understanding, was waiting for me while I was in the valley. He was standing on top of the hill, arms wide open, ready to clothe me in a robe fit for a queen, with a feast prepared for a kingdom. That is the most amazing thing about God. He is always waiting for His prodigal sons and daughters to come home. This song really made me just cry out to God and ask for His complete satisfaction. The singer was talking about how this was inspired by Psalm 90:

"Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days." v. 14

This was my prayer. I went to sleep that night after asking the Lord to fill me up. When I woke up the next morning, I felt lighter. I know that sounds so dumb, but I was feeling especially cheerful and in high spirits. This made way for some other amazing things to happen between me and God on that trip. He affirmed my desire to go on a summer project. I am still praying about where, but I think it might be Salerno, Italy. He also urged me to share the Gospel with two people who I probably would not have shared it with just because I was afraid, and He gave me the strength to do so.

My point is when we turn to Christ for satisfaction and STOP looking around in the world for fullness, He is faithful to bring it to us. When we place our eyes on Him fully, we are able to see more clearly the things He has for us. I challenge you to really look at where you are finding comfort and satisfaction. If it is anything other than God, you will be let down eventually. Of course I will always struggle with this, too, but as long as we acknowledge our desire to stray, we will be reminded of what to do when it springs up: ask God to satisfy us with His unfailing love!